Yet ANOTHER TV Terrors Episode everyone!!!

Yes Dear HorrorFiends! The very first review of an Are You Afraid of the Dark Episode…and NO! it is not that damn clown episode.

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TERROR TV – ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK – the Tale of the Crimson Clown

17 The Tale of the Crimson Clown.mp4_000673146HAPPY NEW YEAR HORROR FIENDS!……well…okay yes we know its February and were really late with saying happy New Year. You see here at Hidden Horrors we all have been talking a much needed break because quite frankly the Christmas season really kicked all our asses and plus our reviewers and myself have other stuff going on in our lives too. Remember this blog is pretty much just for fun. Anyway without further ado i would like to present the very first Hidden Horrors you must see review of 2015 and its a Terror TV review of an episode of the classic Nickolodean kids horror anthology show ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK. And like the last review of Are you Afraid of the Dark this one is again about a evil clown. This one is the Tale of the Crimson Clown.

Tale of the Crimson Clown is practically your basic children’s horror morality tale of being a good little boy. Its about two young brothers one is good and the younger one is a little bastard. He always does what he wants and even steals the money his brother earned and wanted to use for there mothers birthday and buys himself a video game and then blames his brother on it to there mother. So basically you already hate this little bastard right from the get go. But before getting home the little boy sees a odd yet creepy old clown doll at the antic store and is told it punishes bad kids. He quickly brushes it off but deep down the guilt of what he has done starts to get to him and soon he sees visions of the Crimson clown haunting him.

What works for this particular Are you Afraid of the Dark episode is the sheer simplicity to its horror story. Its basically a rotten little boy being taught a lesson by the supernatural and though the storyline is simple it has quite a well crafted scenes of creepiness and nightmare inducing imaginary sure to gets little kids Shivering. Particularly the scenes where the clown doll just shows up at random places just sitting there taunting the boy without saying or doing anything or one vision the boy has is of the clowns arm coming out  of the television stretching to abnormal length trying to get the clown and laughing at him.

So if you want to show your little ones a particulary creepy episode of the kids horror show from our childhood to really scare them straight or you just want to revisit a classic show from the 90s. Seek out the creepy clown doll episode “Tale of the Crimson Clown” an episode i would go so far as to say it is a more effective clown episode then the now famous “Tale of the Laughing in the Dark”.  – James J. Coker

TERROR TV AND HIDDEN HORROR – Cry Baby Lane

Cry Baby Lane“Song of the South” was a film made in 1946 that was later banned by Disney due to an insensitive plot revolving around a tall tale teller on a tenant farm. In recent years many people have discussed if the film should remain outlawed by same the company that birthed it. I’m not here to discuss that whatsoever, I’m simply here to shed light on a film with a very similar fate.

In the year 2000 Nickelodeon made a TV movie called “Cry Baby Lane,” which was to be aired on the week of Halloween. The film was basically an hour long “Are You Afraid of the Dark?” episode, with way too many commercial breaks in order to keep your attention span fighting with itself, like the awkward climax of an Eddie Murphy comedy. Well, the latter may have been true at least (except for any appearances by Mr. Murphy). However the plot was a bit more over the top than the aforementioned half hour campfire adventures via our very own midnight society. Instead of cold ghosts, holes in barrels or red clown nose hexes we had Frank Langella starring in the story of conjoined twins – one brother good, the other one conveniently evil. They eventually took ill and died together in one sloppy Picasso of a sibling C.H.U.D. Their creepy farmer father then took his trusty hacksaw and well, separated them at death. He buried the good twin in a cemetery and the bad twin in a random grave right outside the farm house. This is the story told in order to set up the main plot, which revolves around a group of kids trying to prove that this local legend is true.

Ok, ok, I know you may be disappointed that none of the gruesome story told in the film is actually seen on screen and that there is much more intense content out there than this, but hear me out. This was produced by Nickelodeon for Nickelodeon’s target child audience. That’s pretty fucked up! Needless to say the movie was aired once on October 28, 2000 and was never aired OR SPOKEN of again. The main and most valid rumor for this is that the sheer amount of parents who complained that their children had been lobotomized by a borderline PG-13 script had shamed the Nick name so much they wanted to forget they had ever produced the televised Polybius.

The film was forgotten for years to come. That is until 2011 when it resurfaced on Reddit, thus inspiring “The 90s Are All That” to re-air it for the first and only time since the new millennium. Before this film was re-aired many internet rumors had sprung up (right next to the lizard people and Man Bear Pig sections) claiming that the film was cursed, the creators were incarcerated and that the film was aired only in order to to conduct a mysterious ritual upon suburban America. Yeah, we all know it was just banned by Nick before more soccer moms tried to sue Viacom. No matter what the endless amounts of CreepyPastas tell you, it’s nothing more, nothing less. But don’t fret fellow 90’s kids, we all know what eventually happens to all banned children films… They become awesome log flume rides!

Happy New Year Everyone!

– Sterling “The Spork Guy” Anno

12 SLAYS OF CHRISTMAS – TERROR TV – TALES FROM THE DARKSIDE – Seasons of Belief

grither1For our very first “12 Slays of Christmas” review I thought I would look into a Christmas episode of the anthology series “Tales from the Darkside.” I found the episode Seasons of Belief and boy is this a fun and atmospheric one.

Seasons of Belief concerns a father on Christmas Eve who ends his two children’s boredom by telling them a scary story about a fearsome Christmas Eve beast known as the Grither. This creature searches and attacks all those who dare say his name out loud.

What works so well for this seasonal episode is that not only is it ripe with cheery Christmas atmosphere but the tone is both fun and creepy. It’s fun because both the parents really get into scaring the shit out of their kids with the story and its creepy because there’s little moments that make you wonder whether the story is true or not…well until you get to the predictable yet still satisfying ending.

If you’re looking for some cheery yuletide Terror TV episodes then look no further then this episode of “Tales from the Darkside.”

-James J. Coker

HIDDEN HORROR – Disney’s Something Wicked This Way Comes

something_wicked_this_way_comesWhen one hears the word Disney they think of the wonderful kids films they grew up with. Well did you know that in 1983 Disney made a horror film. Yes you read that right and not just any horror film, but a dark and mature one based on a book by the late great Ray Bradbury. It’s the only Disney film to take one of Walt Disney’s ideals, the concept that dreams do come true, and darkly twist it. That movie is “Something Wicked This Way Comes” and boy is it a damn good one that sadly most don’t remember.

In a small American town in the 1920s or 1930s (its never specified) Mr. Dark’s Pandemonium Carnival comes rolling into town in the middle of the night. However this isn’t your normal carnival, it is led by the Mysterious Mr. Dark, a man who can grant your very hearts desire…but at a cost. It’s up to two young boys, Jim Nightshade and Will Holloway, to discover the truth of Mr. Dark’s carnival before it preys upon all of the townsfolk.

What really depresses me about this film is not the film itself but how no one of my generation knows of it and didn’t grow up with it. Luckily I did and for me it was the film that best represented the cautionary tale of “Be Careful what you Wish for.“  Though it’s rated PG it’s a very mature and grown-up kind of horror film with its adult characters longing for what they desire. You can feel the regrets from the characters and have sympathy for these troubled townsfolk. With the adult themes it manages to be a wonderful kids coming of age film. Jim and Will are great characters who you sympathize with. Last, you have an absolutely wonderful villain in Mr. Dark, a mysterious man whom you’re not truly sure if he even is a man or something else entirely. There are plenty of genuine moments of creepiness. Truly the only “adult” Disney villain.

If you want to show your little ones a Disney film of a truly different nature where both kids and adults will be intrigued then I cannot recommend “Something Wicked This Way Comes” enough. A truly dark and wicked Disney film that I hope you will all enjoy.

-James J. Coker

31 HIDDEN HORRORS FOR HALLOWEEN – OCT.23rd – HIDDEN HORROR – Ernest Scared Stupid

Now I know what you all are thinking, whoa! that’s a kids movie. Well yes it’s a kids movie but it’s also a kids horror/Halloween movie. I believe a true horror fan should appreciate kids horror films because they are the training wheels for future horror fans.

All right…now that we have that out of the way let’s get back to this wonderfully adorable Halloween kids film. You see there’s quite a number of fun horror films to watch with your kids if you have them: “Hocus Pocus” (which gets way too much praise) “The Monster Squad,” “Monster House,” “Frankenweenie,” “ParaNorman,” and then there’s this little nugget from the ’90s. You see to ’90s kids there was this film and “Hocus Pocus” to watch every Halloween and while “Hocus Pocus” is a classic I feel “Ernest Scared Stupid” is just not talked about at all. Because of that I feel making this a “Hidden Horror” is right.

After a misunderstanding Ernest P. Worrell unleashes an evil troll on Halloween.

Out of all of the Ernest movies out there this one has to be the one that I have the fondest memories of. The film is silly and harmless, as it should be for a kids film, and though the troll can frighten some little ones the film never plays itself seriously at all. Jim Varney is at his absolute silliest here and theres one scene, where Ernest fights the troll in the back of his truck, that is soo incredibly fun that it will bring a smile to your face, especially when he yells the line “how about a bumper sandwich booger lips!”

So if you have some little ones and are tired of showing them “Hocus Pocus” every Halloween season why not pop in “Ernest Scared Stupid” and enjoy the harmless, silly and utterly adorable Halloween kids film.

-James J. Coker